The Gift of Choice: A chance to change & embrace who you are


Dear Claudia

Thank you for your recent comment on this weeks blog, as well as your thoughtful questions.  I have given it some thought, and hope that this advice serves you well.
Like all things in life, change is a process.  One of the most important things to remember is – take it one step-at-a-time and day to day.  Be patient with yourself while you are trying to change for the better.   In fact, if something happens in your day that makes you feel bad about yourself or the choice you made, then re-choose. You can actually choose to start and restart your day over and over again. Very often we feel as though we have made a mistake and beat ourselves up about it and then continue on that path, which actually influences our ability to make good choices for ourselves.   The first thing to remember is that we always have the gift of choice. And while we may not be able to choose what happens to us, we can definitely choose our reaction to it.

This change you seek; if it is a physical matter, (let’s say perhaps you want to get into better shape or have a more balanced lifestyle)… well then, you need to take the correct and healthy steps to achieve your goal.  Ensure you have balanced and nutritional meals, be conscientious about exercising, even if it is 20 minutes a day initially, whererever your starting point is, make sure it is one that you feel is doable so you don’t set yourself up for failure before you even try. Remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day, slowly, slowly.

If it is a personality trait or a tendency that you have recognized, just that awareness alone sets the ball of change into motion.  Now all you have to do is heighten your consciousness and ask yourself, “how can I do things differently?” or “how can I behave differently?”  or “how can I react differently?”

Initially, it will feel incredibly difficult, like breaking a bad habit, but by awakening your consciousness and slowly implementing that change gradually day-to-day you will create a new and healthier “habit”, which will hopefully serve you better in the long run. But please, don’t get down on yourself, we are only human, we make mistakes, and when we do, just simply take a breath and make a note of it, and then say to yourself, “Okay, next time I am going to try and do that differently.”  And then just honor that promise you made to yourself.

As for loving yourself more; Claudia, just remember that we are all born with self-love and self-worth, and very often we lose that along the way. But self worth and love is not something you ever need to earn, it is a natural, human right; to love and appreciate you for you.  Do not spend time comparing yourself to others, time is precious, don’t waste your precious time on matters that will only make you feel “less than”.  Remember, you are a beautiful human being, a human “becoming”(I like to say), because life is a process, we are constantly growing and striving to become the best versions of ourselves. Be you, be proud of you and just simply, love yourself more.  You owe yourself that much.

I will leave you with a very profound Chinese proverb that I hope will inspire you.

With love,

“Do not fear going forward slowly; fear only to stand still.”

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